Not too long ago I took it upon myself to try a 21 day meditation challenge hosted by the fab Deepak Chopra. A struggle at first, I pushed through and am now exploring any other mantras, meditative music or spiritual insight he has to offer. I find that without starting my day with meditation, I start to feel a little on edge and kooky. If Deepak says it, I’m probably going to do it…..except for his lavish all-inclusive Meditation luxury retreats. I just spent most of my dinero on my all so wonderful plumbing fiasco (more to come).
In addition to my spiritual exploration, I started to randomly select from a stack of Dalai Lama Contemplation Cards. They look like giant playing cards with a saying on one side and an adorable pic of the Dalai Lama on the other. He is so damn cute! I must admit the cards sometimes take a few series of reading, pausing, reading, pausing, and then asking my wife or Zen nomadic roomie Kat for further interpretation.
So the last card I drew yesterday was simply titled “Patience”. Patience….hmmmm. Well forgive me but my patience card ran out a few days ago. During the month of April, my patience card was dangled in front of my face on more than one occasion. Our basement toilet has been a repeated violator lately. To start, the toilet had no pressure – meaning it wouldn’t take the kids to the pool. Baltimore City came out and flushed the main street line and all was resolved. The site of what was under that man-hole cover would have knocked you on your a**. A few days later the same thing happened. Baltimore city annoyingly came out again. Whatever…that’s why I pay taxes. Another couple of days went by and all hell broke loose. My household and I spent a good portion of the night shoveling crap out of our reverse bidet. It wouldn’t stop. Plumbers came out and cleaned the line. Installed a new toilet even. I was relieved and content and my pockets were drained. But that’s ok because I could use the toilet in peace.
Well not really. My wife starts a load of laundry and notices water leaking from the toilet. She goes upstairs to call the plumber again. Cute young guys who wear yamakas. Name of their company-“Honest Abe”. Love it. She goes back downstairs and water is gushing from behind the washer and flooding the basement. She tells me this in her “calm” voice as I am working my clients out. I start to freak out internally but quickly gather myself to finish up the last workouts of the day. Abe comes back and rips the toilet out and cleans the lines…again. He tells us that we might have a cracked pipe. Dolla bills y’all. Dolla dolla bills y’all…flying out of my piggy bank. He’s sending someone else out with a toilet camera to inspect. We spend the rest of the day mopping up a small basement pool. Luckily without poo.
Next scene/next day…Tom shows up with his techy gadgets and tools. This I must admit excites me as I love tools and technology. He puts the “sea snake” down the toilet hole and warns us that we might not want to watch. My wife takes the warning. I tell him to bring it! Not so bad. After all I am gearing up for a new baby. So we discover no cracked pipes..just some grease from the 1980’s which had built up for years and years. Yes!!!!!! My dolla bills are gracefully flying back into my baby fund. My wife and I are on the brink of tears! Tom leaves us with some guidelines of how to treat our plumbing lines and give them TLC. I love Tom. I feel as though we have bonded.
So all is good in the hood. I go out for tri training brick (after swimming you immediately bike or run). Good times. I swim for an hour mainly with one hand behind my back alternating every 100 strokes with different intensities. Wow. What a humbling and frustrating experience. I was so annoyed with feeling like a lopsided beached sea creature. No I don’t have control issues! I slithered my way onto my bike and got stung by some kind of insect within the first 10 minutes. Oh no you didn’t. I ripped the insect from inside my shirt sleeve and charged on. I will finish this! And I did.
Feeling on top again and not defeated I came home and was able to safely use my sink, shower and bathroom with peace of mind. The next day I eagerly waited to draw my Dalai Lama card. Oh this is going to be good. And whadda ya know…”Patience” was pulled. Hahahahhaha. I love it. His interpretation was as follows: “When unfavorable circumstances come about, we pray that our suffering may absorb the sufferings of all beings. This way of thinking and wishing is exceedingly wondrous. This is what it really means when we hear that the altruistic mind of a bodhisattva brings about his or her own happiness”. Bam there you have it people. Although, I’m not going to lie, I had to get further interpretation from my Zen master roomie Kat.